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  • WHAT SHOULD WE DO? PLEASE ADVISE!

     Matthew Shokunbi updated 6 months, 2 weeks ago 6 Members · 9 Posts
  • Matthew Shokunbi

    Member
    December 4, 2020 at 03:30

    I have been working on some projects, one which relates to a controversial topic on abortion. I came up with a drama case study. Could you please listen (watch in your mind) and advise. Please don’t read without commenting.

    P.S – Please imagine yourself as either one of the subjects here, and be free to share your honest view in light of the situation.

    Husband: Hi Dear, what’s wrong? (with a worried face).

    Wife: Nothing, nothing! I’m fine (with a smile)

    Husband: (With arms around her on the sofa). Come on Peju, I know you more than this, there is something wrong with you, talk to me.

    Wife: Ehm ehm, I don’t know how it happened, really! Please forgive me; It’s not intentional…I didn’t…

    Husband: (Snapped in)….This is what I don’t like about you Peju, go straight to the point. What will my darling wife do that I won’t forgive her.

    Wife: I am, ehm, ehm, I am pregnant

    Husband: (Withdrawing his arms immediately)…..What do you mean? how did it happen? When did that happen? How come?…..No no no! I thought we have agreed on this, are you not taking your pills….

    Wife: (Sobbing) I do, that’s why I said I don’t understand!

    Husband: What don’t you understand? That we already have 2 boys and 2 girls, that you are not working and my salary is barely sustaining us, that we are on debts and even struggling to pay the three older children’s school fees? That your pills ……

    Wife: (cuts-in) I’m sorry….

    Husband: Stop sorrying me, sorry is not the solution here….I’ve known you to be a careless woman…Okay, how many months is it?

    Wife: The doctor says it’s seven (7) weeks, but I only got to know last weeks

    Husband: (with a brighter face) Ehnehn….that’s just less than 2 months old right?

    Wife: Yes

    Husband: Peju, we have to do something about this. What will my friends say. Five children is way out of it. We already have both male and female, there is no third gender…Please let’s do something.

    Wife: Ok. Like what?

    Husband: Don’t ask me that. You should know better.

    Wife: I don’t know….

    Husband: Ok you want to hear it from my mouth abi? We are aborting it simple!

    Wife: Ah Banji? Abortion? That is murder!

    Husband: Look woman! Stop being holy pass here, that is the only option I know of here, if you have any other, let me know. But to think you will keep that thing in your stomach, not in this house.

    Wife: Dear, we are Christians! You are a Deacon and a Sunday school teacher, I’m the lead choir and….

    Husband: (cuts-in) And what, and what? I didn’t ask you to preach to me woman, if you don’t agree with abortion, then come up with another option.

    Wife: I can’t abort o, I’ve never and will never subject myself to such.

    Husband: If you know you can’t, then common sense demands that you should have been careful… All I know, and I am standing on is that we are not keeping this pregnancy, except you will raise the child as a bastard. Careless woman! (storms out of the house)

    Wife: Ah Banji! (Weeping…..)

    END: What would you advise, considering both parties’ cases. Share your views, experiences and reservations.

  • Samuel Olaoye

    Member
    December 4, 2020 at 17:44

    Good day brothers and sisters, it is my firm belief that there are consequences for every action, I mean every single one. I could just be blunt and call a spade a spade by saying that abortion is evil and the couple have no choice but to obey the biblical injunction about murder; but I also understand that there is serious pressure accompanying having a baby one did not plan for and in fact from the experience of a church member, it could be much worse than the very heavy financial strain, which has led some men to hating the child and mother. It’s why I have decided that if God willing I have two or three kids, I will personally do a vasectomy in order to make sure that my semen can no longer fertilize any eggs. I believe that’s how to plan in order to avoid stories that touch as we like to say.

    • Matthew Shokunbi

      Member
      December 5, 2020 at 23:01

      Wow! This brother meant business o. Going all out for vasectomy! Your view is all the way objective. Thanks.

  • Adedamola Komolafe

    Member
    December 4, 2020 at 18:45

    Well, the did had already been done. The point here is that It’s not the responsibility of the wife alone to protect herself from unwanted pregnancy it is both parties. Well in this case they’re now expecting a baby…. they will have to stand together and patiently wait for baby number 5, next time they should be more careful.

    • Iwayemi Olanorin

      Member
      December 4, 2020 at 19:08

      Lobatan…🤣🤣🤣. Thanks bro for going straight to the point. ‘Lesson learnt the hard way’: I guess is another way of interpreting your response

  • Dosumu Adeola

    Member
    December 5, 2020 at 07:29

    There is no excuse for attempting abortion,perhaps the fact some people define abortion as getting rid of an unwanted pregnancy makes it easy for them to even contemplate the idea but in my own opinion it is blatant murder.now in this case I believe they are just destined to have more than four children,they could even be on family planning and some situation would arise and she would still get pregnant and now the creator that moulded that child in the mother’s belly will provides means to take care of him/her.things may be tough and the entire process may be hard to endure buy it will surely end well.No one deserves to be killed more so a defenseless child.my advise is for them to keep and nurture the child.

    • Matthew Shokunbi

      Member
      December 5, 2020 at 22:56

      Well said Adeola. No one deserves to be killed.

  • Oluwaseun Odelade

    Member
    December 5, 2020 at 20:49

    Foremost, i will talk about the game of ‘finger pointing’ played by the man. They both engaged in the act and they should both be responsible, its absolutely unfair to assume the woman should take the blame.

    We see abortion from different perspectives there by giving different folks justification for the act, this is not to make anyone that has done same in the past feel bad, we just need to help ourselves with the truth. Abortion, either done at the 1st week of conception or much later or on health reasons is murder. It is such murder that the judicial system of countries are yet to make illegal and given the same verdict as for those who commited homicide or other murders. Its more like killing someone without their consent. I have not seen where someone will permit his/her own death except in movies.

    I have a family friend, the wife after 3 children in 2 conceptions got pregnant again with twins as shown from the pregnancy result. I got to know about the story during a complaint about the wife about my friends reaction to the pregnancy. She further explained how she prayed about the pregnancy and she claimed miscarriage came. She shared it more like a testimony of how God helped them get rid of the unwanted pregnancy. I was stunned and all i could do was to nod my head in acceptance of her claim. Only God know what really happened if the miscarriage was divine or planned (abortion).

    Second one, (sorry for your time) is a story i heared long time ago, that a child died cos she was has sickle cell, they said the father was warned at the pregnancy stage when they discovered her genotype was, that they should get rid of the baby during pregnancy. I may not validate this as i am not a medical practitioner but what i want to bring out from here is the fact that babies with sickle cell can be detected from the womb and hence there is justifications for their abortion being that it will save the parents the stress of nuturing the child and also for the child not to suffer.

    With the two scenarios, and others that i may not know are situations that give justification for abortion. It should be clearly stated that abortion is sin and God doesn’t support murder in any form. The first claim that she prayed the prenancy out, if she claimed she prayed and God answered her, the same God wouldnt have permitted the pregnancy in the first place. Maybe she was right about her claim that the miscarriage was divine but why did she have to pray it through, its like she unturned an event or prevent an event from happening through prayers, well what she didnt tell me or what i didnt ask her (in order not to make her feel bad or regret sharing the story with me) is if she checked through prayers that the pregnancy was the will of God? or that the divine miscarriage was also the will of God.

    The second family that didnt abort thier sickle cell baby after detecting were blamed for bringing the child to the world to suffer, maybe they would have set things right before marraige and putting into consideration the right genotype match for couples. For me i think they have done the right thing by keeping the baby even if she stayed for a short period, we have seen healthy people die with no traces of any health complications.

    Many times we are insensitive in our actions and we tend to place rationale to our actions basically from a perspective that suits us, it would have been better the other way that the parent seek the consent of the children before aborting them, a situation where you have a chat with the unborn child and she/he eventually reasons with you and permit the abortion, but thats more fictional and may happen only in movies and dramas. Even as it is illegal to take ones life on act on someones permission to take his/her life.

    Bottom line is does God permit those things we see as best or rationale, does it support His will?, if an unplanned child or children came, it is the parents that didnt plan for child but God has plans for him/her, even the parents too are under Gods plan. So it absolutely wrong and under no circumstance should abortion permitted. There is no justification for the such action. A family have 4 children already and aborted the fifth for economic reasons acted foolishly as they don’t even know which of the children will “sustain them” We have seen nonfictional facts about a child being the light in the family, we have heared and seen a particular child in the family taking the family out of poverty, from success of one spreading to others. Even in the bible the likes of Joseph, David etc, the least expected people.

    Lets see the story of Onan Gen38: 1-12. Onan that was instructed by God to go lie with his late brother’s s wife, and thinking through that the child may not be his own spilled the semen on the floor, this angered God and also lead to his death. He had justification for his actions but God was interested in the offspring, he acted against the will of God and he died for it. This is just to buttress the fact that rationale is not enough in the concept of conception or abortion, the will of God is key.

    In summary abortion is sin and should not be encouraged at all. Most importantly we should allow the will of God in our decisions. Lets check what we pray about most times. Gods ways surpasses morals and rationale. 1 cor. 6:12

    • Matthew Shokunbi

      Member
      December 5, 2020 at 22:59

      Wow! This is a great perspective. I can see you raising more critical questions on “permissible” abortion and other related ones. Thanks so much for your insight on the topic.

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